Do you ever find yourself hovering like a helicopter parent over your kids’ every move and sheltering them from life?
Today’s guest, Michelle Carlson, is the founder of Peace and Parenting. Michelle helps parents navigate through what it really means to be a connected parent.
In this episode, you’ll hear what helicopter parenting is and why you should strive to be a less reactionary parent and how sometimes, it’s okay to let your kids fail.
She shares how to recognize if you’re inadvertently subjecting your kids to helicopter parenting, how to manage your anxieties without projecting them onto your kids and how dynamics from past relationships affect you as a parent.
WHAT’S IN THIS EPISODE:
- How Michelle got into positive, peaceful and connected parenting after coming into motherhood
- What helicopter parenting is and what it looks like
- How helicopter parenting makes kids lack an internal resiliency
- Becoming a less reactionary parent and knowing you don’t have to “fix” everything
- How the different parenting styles play into helicopter parenting
- How parents can manage their anxieties without projecting that onto their children
- Taking care of yourself and being emotionally nourished so you can take care of your kids
- Reflecting back on your childhood to unpack issues that are brought to the surface in parenting
- Learning to let your kids fail
- How overprotective parenting can affect children in the long run
- Arguments that people have for helicopter parenting
- What you need to know about teenagers and helicopter parenting
- How to recognize as a parent if you’re inadvertently subjecting your kids to helicopter parenting
- Giving your kids the tools to do the right thing without the promise for rewards
- How adversity helps you become a stronger person
- What’s next for Michelle for her personal life and business
LINKS & RESOURCES MENTIONED:
- Connect with Michelle:
MORE ABOUT HELICOPTER PARENTING AND THE FOUNDER OF PEACE AND PARENTING:
Michelle lives in Los Angeles with her two girls 9 and 12. Before becoming a Hand in Hand certified instructor in 2015, she worked for 12 years in public schools as a teacher and counselor.
She also served as an adjunct professor in the Department of Education instructing in the teacher credentialing program. None of which prepared her to be a mom. After years of consequences, bribes and star charts she found Hand in Hand parenting, created by Patty Wipfler. It reshaped the relationship she shares with her daughters, and she credits it with changing her life.
She is passionate about helping others find their way through the murky business of being a connected parent. She loves leading groups and finds dynamic transformative.
Michelle has helped herself and others make meaningful connections, work on sibling rivalry, and alleviate school problems. Aggression, fears, withdrawal and sleep issues are just some of the struggles she has shared and helped others rectify.
OUR FAVORITE QUOTES FROM MICHELLE CARLSON:
“Helicopter parents have their own internal anxiety about how their kids are existing in the world.”
“I think that’s where helicopter parenting really stems from is they really don’t want to see their kids struggle.”
“I think the pendulum swung too far over to where we’re not letting kids struggle. We’re not letting kids learn from life and learn from the process.”
“Feelings are okay. All feelings. Especially the negative ones. It’s okay to have them and it’s okay not to fix them.”
“We project everything onto our children because we’re victims of our own experience.”